It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
