Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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