the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
