I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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