i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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