I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize