The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Randomize