He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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