Is it because I queefed?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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