i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
