I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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