I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
