He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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