discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
