oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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