haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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