quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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