I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
we should paint friendship bongs
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
