Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
He kissed a someone with a penis
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Randomize
