Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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