so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
