Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
it wasn't lemon gatorade
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize