If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
