i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
