It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
