I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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