We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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