I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
