yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
