Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
