no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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