No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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