I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I think I just sharted jello shots
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