two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
