ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
