There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
