Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Why is your signature on my underwear?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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