I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
