Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Are my feet made of real feet?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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