saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
