Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize