so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize