Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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