dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
