So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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