I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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