i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
