My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize