She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Drunk is a universal language darling
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
