I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
