yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again