A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student