Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
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I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
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Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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