you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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